Abba, My Dear

It is interesting to note that Shmuel’s father’s name was, in fact, “Abba.” The Shulchan Aruch discusses (YD 240:2) the halacha regarding someone whose father has a rather rare name. The Shulchan Aruch rules that if someone has a friend with the same rare name as his father, he should not call his friend by the same rare name. The Vilna Gaon explains that the source for this halacha is the Aruch, who explains Abaye’s name.

The Aruch explained that Rabbah Bar Nachmeini intentionally called his star pupil by the nickname Abaye, instead of his real name, Nachmeini. Indeed, the name Abaye means “my father,” implying that he was unable to call Abaye by his given name because it was the same as his father’s. The Aruch L’ner comments that it seems that the name “Abba” is somewhat rare. Shmuel would not have called Rav by his given name “Abba” since he shares that with Shumel’s father. Moreover, even if the name “Abba” is not rare, why wouldn’t Shmuel out of respect for his father simply call Rav by the accepted name “Rav” instead of using “Abba”?

The Aruch L’ner uses this fact to explain why Rashi disagreed with Tosefos. He says that a great Amora like Shmuel would have refrained from using his colleague’s given name, since it was the same as his father’s – especially since there was an alternative, to just call him “Rav” like everyone else. Rashi explained therefore that when Shmuel called Rav “Abba,” he was not using a proper name. Rather, the intent was an endearing term for “father,” since he was one of the greatest sages of the generation. Even though Shmuel was not able to use “Abba” as an actual name, he was able to use “Abba” as an honorific title. Still, this assumes that “Abba” was not actually Rav’s name according to Rashi.

The Chida proposes that even Rashi could agree that Rav’s given name was Abba. Rashi still feels that the intent of “Abba” was an endearing term. The Chida suggests that perhaps we may conclude that a child may call his father “Abba” even if that is his given name, just as others called Rav by the name “Abba” as an endearing term even though that was his given name. However, the Chida states that one shouldn’t run to follow this leniency. After all, perhaps we can differentiate between the two scenarios. Rav was one of the greatest sages of the generation; hardly anyone referred to him by his real name (at least according to Rashi). With that background, the term Abba can be an honorary title.

However, where a person is known as Abba and that is his commonly used name, it would be a breach of kavod for a son to use Abba to refer to his father, even if his intent was for an endearing name. The Shem HaGedolim concurs with this latter approach and says that Rav’s true name was in total disuse and therefore it was permitted for his students to call him Abba. If, however, a scholar’s given name of Abba was still in use, then his student should not refer to him as Abba.

For practical guidance on what to call a father named “Abba,” ask your Abba.