Don’t Cry Over Spilled Wine

Rashi explains that someone who is wealthy but in his house wine does not flow freely like water is not included in the category of blessed. Rashi doesn’t explain why the Gemara uses the phrase “spilled like water.” The Maharsha explains that generally people are careful when pouring wine to ensure it doesn’t spill. After all, it is quite expensive. Water on the other hand is not handled as carefully. Sure people don’t want a mess, but there is no great loss if it spills. The Gemara is saying that if in someone’s house wine is treated as irreverently as water, in that they are unconcerned with spillage, they have reached the category of beracha. The Gemara is defining the level of wealth referred to in the pasuk. This level of wealth is one of the rewards for keeping the mitzvos.

The Ein Eliyahu says that the aforementioned pshat is relevant to the following scenario. Someone makes a vow to give another individual a gift if his business venture is successful and he is blessed. According to this understanding, one would only be obligated to give the gift if he was successful to the point that wine in his house is treated as water.

The Meiri understands the Gemara as referring to magnanimity. Someone who is generous with his wine and offers it to poor and downtrodden people will be included in the category of beracha.

The Ben Yehoyada understands the Gemara as being instructive to curb excesses from one’s life. One should treat wine like water. Generally, people only drink water when they are thirsty. Unless someone is following some fad diet directive, they don’t overindulge in water. So too, wine should be drunk in moderation.

Perhaps the Taz’s explanation is more well known. The Taz notes that the Gemara doesn’t say that one should spill wine in his house in the present tense. Rather the Gemara refers to a house that already had wine spilled in it. That house is included in beracha. The Taz says that the Gemara is literally referring to a house where someone accidentally spilled wine. Generally, a homeowner would be incensed and scream at the offender. However, a punishment for anger is poverty. If the homeowner would react to spillage of wine the same way as he would react to the spillage of water, then he will receive abundant blessings. This is the reward for not getting angry.

So where does the custom come from to spill the havdalah wine? We seem to be hard pressed to find a source. In fact, many Acharonim want to put a cork in the minhag because it is baal tashchis akin to wasting food and drink.

Evidently, the Rema (based on the Shiltei Giborim) understood our Gemara literally. The spilling of wine in one’s home is itself a good omen for prosperity. The Gemara makes no mention of Shabbos or havdalah. However, havdalah was chosen as the time to spill the wine because we want to start off the week with a siman beracha. This is similar to the special foods we eat on Rosh Hashanah. There we want to start the year with a siman beracha.

The Rema advises one to spill the havdalah wine in the middle of the beracha of borei p’ri hagafen. One shouldn’t spill it before the beracha because then he would not be reciting the beracha on a full cup of wine which is preferable. One can’t spill it after the beracha, because that is bizuy mitzvah—disgracing the mitzvah. How can you spill the wine after you just made a beracha on it? The solution is to spill the cup in the middle of the beracha.

The Taz strongly disagrees with this suggestion. He reasons that the cup must be full for the duration of the entire beracha. Further, the Taz states that there is no basis for the minhag, since he understood the Gemara differently as mentioned earlier. Rather, he advises that those who want to fulfill this custom should overflow the cup of wine in the process of filling it. In this way one isn’t performing a distinct action solely for the purpose of wasting food. Rather some wine spills in the process of filling his goblet and not much is spilled anyway. The Taz says that this is what he personally always did.

It is interesting to note that even though the Taz disagreed with the Rema and found no source for the custom, he didn’t completely abandon the minhag but followed it anyway, albeit with some differences.