Raising the Steaks: Why the Nasi Bought the Cow

The Gemara in Kiddushin explains that a groom may appoint an agent to perform kiddushin – the ring ceremony – on his behalf. (The subsequent chuppah – standing under the canopy – and the yichud room must be done by the groom himself.) If the chosson were to get cold feet at the last moment, he could theoretically send his best man to slip the ring on the kallah’s finger, though one imagines the wedding pictures would come out a bit...confusing. Still, the Gemara teaches a key principle: mitzvah bo yoser mibishlucho, it is a greater mitzvah to perform a commandment oneself rather than through a proxy.

The Gemara notes this also applies to Shabbos preparation. Indeed, this is cited as practical halacha. The Shulchan Aruch (Orach Chayim 250) urges everyone to rise early on Fridays to prepare for Shabbos personally, even if household help is available. It points to the shining examples of our sages: Rav Chisda finely chopped vegetables, Rabah and Rav Yosef split wood, Rabbi Zeira kindled the flame, and Rav Nachman cleaned and swapped the cutlery. Their actions remind us that the honor of Shabbos is no small chop.

The Ohr Zarua (125) notes that marrying one’s kallah and preparing for Shabbos are the only two mitzvos that should be performed personally whenever possible. True, some mitzvos like lulav and shofar can’t be delegated at all. But when a mitzvah can be performed via a shaliach, it is perfectly acceptable to do so.

Yet most authorities reject this idea. The Magen Avraham, codified by the Mishna Berura (OC 250), rules that these two cases form a paradigm for all mitzvos: one should strive to perform any mitzvah personally, rather than hiring a proxy. After all, even the Nasi personally visited the market to buy a cow for his son’s chasunah. Surely, he could have sent a clerk, but he chose to shoulder the task himself, infusing the simcha with his own direct involvement.

But this raises another question: doesn’t this clash with the principle that a talmid chacham or community leader should avoid menial tasks to preserve their dignity and public respect? How did Rabban Gamliel skirt this issue?

Indeed, we find numerous sages throughout the generations who engaged in seemingly humble tasks, such as baking matzos, building sukkahs, and even erecting fences. Rav Nachman, for instance, built a fence around his roof with his own hands. The Pri Megadim explains that the Shulchan Aruch directly addresses this concern. After instructing even scholars to prepare for Shabbos themselves, it adds: “One should not say, ‘It is beneath me,’ for this is the honor of Shabbos.”

The Pri Megadim elaborates: performing mitzvos elevates, rather than diminishes, the stature of a sage. A scholar who rolls up his sleeves for a mitzvah doesn’t lose respect; he gains it. When great Torah leaders baked matzos, built sukkahs, or prepared for Shabbos, onlookers recognized a mitzvah in progress. Rav Nachman was clearly fulfilling the mitzvah of maakeh, constructing a fence around a roof.

So too, Rabban Gamliel’s trip to the market was no mere grocery run. The community knew of his son’s upcoming wedding; it was evident that the cow was destined for the seudas mitzvah. His public effort wasn’t just logistical – it was inspirational.

Whether it’s chopping vegetables for Shabbos or choosing the perfect cow for a chasunah, mitzvah performance is best done firsthand. From ancient sages to modern parents packing wet wipes, each detail adds to the kavod of the moment. Because when it comes to mitzvos, there’s no beef with going the extra mile – and the more personal the prep, the more prime the experience.